Elbow: Drop It Like It's Hot

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Drop It Like It's Hot

Ok, there are a lot of things that I want to say but don't really have the words to express them. I'm really in love with life right now, but only for the moment. It might fade in a half hour or so get it while it's hot. I just had therapy session, and like Samantha, I too love my therapist. He's amazing and while I realize that I'll only be with him a short while, I'm really glad that I've had the time with him that I've had.

I feel lost in a way, and that's ok. I feel torn and that's also ok. Being ok is confusing because when you put a stamp on something that it's "ok" then what you're feeling inside is more than ok, you are feeling great. I feel good right now because I've realized that it's ok to be torn and to feel like I want to have sex with a guy, it's ok. I mean I recognize it, I intillecutalize it and notice that it doesn't fit in with my life at the moment so I don't do it. But there's no need to feel guilt about it. I'm horny...cool. So what? Not a big deal. Life goes on and I eat a cheesburger and watch Ugly Betty and I'm fine.

I love my wife so much right now. This may sound awkward, but I don't know what I'd do if she wasn't hot. It's really fun being with her and spending time with her. She's my hero. She's my rock and my savior...forget about Jesus, my wife's the only pilot I need. Just kidding. I take that back. It was for humor only. But in all seriousness I love the Lord and I'm on his team. I recognize that there are more important things to worry about than who I'm having sex with, or what gender people are. If the Prophet says don't have sex outside of a hetero marriage then I'm fine with that, it's not easy, but hey...what is?


Blogger Gay BYU Student said...

Thanks for the post Elbow. I appreciated the positive attitude, which can sometimes be hard to come by. My mood swings a lot, too. And it's usually related to my stress level.
Anyway, thanks for your perspective and burst of optimism.

8:42 PM  
Blogger el veneno said...

That was great to hear elbow. I hope you get to return to this feeling often.

9:27 PM  
Blogger Rusty said...

Sounds like things are going well for you right now, which is good.

What are you going to do when the next wave hits? You're in a lull right now--what can you do to prepare?

8:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This entry is good news. It may restore my hope in the value of therapy after all.

I've been thinking a lot about you lately (see my email) and am glad that the pendulum does swing in both directions.

As Rusty said - be sure to store up the storehouse for the famine to come.


11:45 AM  

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